wonderment

Sometimes you wonder if you’ve made the right choice.

Perhaps God didn’t want me to choose that choice.

Goodness knows how much time I’ve wasted wondering out the pros and cons of various alternatives I have.

On Sunday, a friend shared how she’d chose that morning to go to church instead of attending Qing Ming (annual Tomb-Sweeping Festival) with her non-believing family. It obviously exacerbated the uncomfortable tension at home but she came out of reverence and He rewarded her for that. A well-respected leader found her for a chat during the breakfast get-together and it seems that this older lady knew exactly this friend what this friend was going through. She’d been through it before, you see. My friend really needed that encouragement … You could see in her eyes that she was pretty near breaking point.

However, I thought, “What would be different if she had chosen to attend Qing Ming with her family then? Would God have rewarded her in a totally different way?”

As I walked back to the office swinging my takeaway lunch on one hand, I suddenly saw a vision of what might have happened if my friend had chosen to attend Qing Ming instead.

Sure there are the cons like her parents might think that church is actually pretty negotiable if they make the right amount of fuss, or her parents might force her to go even further like offer joss-sticks and the like …

But they also could see that she wants to honour them, that she was willing to forsake church to be with them. Although she may shie from doing the usual Buddhist rites, it would give her family an opportunity to see how a Christian behaves while she is in the world.

At the end of it all, I think sometimes there is no right or wrong choice. In fact, both choices may be very good. So often we cry out to God, “DADDDDDDDDDDDDDYYY, if You’re out there, please tell me EXACTLY what to do???”

I’ve done it so many times. I hate having too many choices in fact. The more I try to choose, the more frustrated I get. I’d rather have someone decide for me or have everything laid out in black and white which makes choosing a lot easier.

As long as we have chosen to follow Jesus, He can use us in all sorts of situations. Remember Rom 8:28, “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them…”

The chief end of man is to glorify God forever … ~ The Westminster Confession

When I entered Mass Com at the urging of my mother - I wasn’t so sure whether it was what I really wanted to do. In second year, I was sure that I had made the wrong choice, but by graduation, I knew that God had unfolded His marvelous plan. Media was exactly where I should be.

God is bigger than we give Him credit for. Even if we do choose out of selfish motives or ignorance and begin regretting after the deal’s been closed, God can train you and set your character even in the “wrong circumstances”.

This is what I learnt today. Don’t give up on today just because it seems “wrong”. It can become “right” when we know who we serve.

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My heart burns for my uncle who buys books that give such a comprehensive overview of the history of the earth. I nearly laughed in the face of the one line in the book he showed me. It said, “It is amazing how we were created out of nothing.”

Every single word in that book alone vouched for the presence of a Deity but my uncle does not see it. He swears by everything that author says. And I am kicking myself in the butt because I dared not ask him if he believed that preposterous line in the book. It would be such an amazing way to talk about God in a non-threatening way.

My cousin, his son, lent me his National Geographic to read in the visitor’s lounge and while the photos blew me away, I wondered if he ever thought about how he came to be, about God.

My heart can burn a thousand degrees, but if I don’t step out and do something, it means nothing.